Patient Realism

by | Nov 23, 2016 | Family Life, Parenting, Year of Mercy

“Patient Realism” is the title of a section within chapter 7 of the apostolic exhortation Amoris Laetitia -The Joy of Love ‘Towards a Better Education of Children.’  One line to define patient realism is ” changing a child’s behavior involves a gradual process, but also that freedom needs to be channeled and stimulated, since by itself it does not ensure growth in maturity. ”

All parents go through constant self-doubt that they might not be getting this patient realism right. In fact, if we’re honest, most of us won’t… at least not all of the time. And then just occasionally something happens, or a child says or does something that restores your confidence in your parenting abilities. I thank God for just such a recent boost which came in the form and expression of a piece of work from my 7 year old son. He wrote:

A Recipe for A Happy Home

Ingredients:

– Faith Courage

– Love Peace

– Happiness Caring
Method:

1. First, put a teaspoon of courage into a bowl.

2. Sprinkle 100g of love

3. After that carefully pour a teaspoon of faith in a cup.

4. Next gently place 87g of peace.

5. Now put 38g of caring into the mixture

6. Make 51g of happiness icing to put on top of your happy home.

I was most edified by this simple piece of writing from my son, so much so that it made me feel touched by the mercy of God in my fatherhood.  A fitting end to the conclusion of the Year of Mercy… to receive an expression of mercy through my child’s simple uncomplicated love and faith.

May your own conclusion to this jubilee year be one of knowing the gentle peace of Christ.

– Edmund Adamus

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Edmund Adamus

Edmund and his wife Catherine have been married for almost 18 years and have been blessed with 3 children; Patrick (who awaits them in Heaven), Paul and Beatrice. After 13 years of ministry in the Salford diocese and gaining a Master's in moral theology, he served the Archdiocese of Westminster from 2003-16 as Director for Pastoral Affairs/Marriage & Family Life. He successfully established the Annual Mass of Thanksgiving for Matrimony in Westminster cathedral as well as the Annual Theology of the Body Lecture series hosting world renowned scholars such as Michael Waldstein, Janet Smith and Christopher West. Christian Meert was also among those speakers. All his work both past and present has been through the prism of the truths of Humanae vitae. Since 2019 he has been Education Consultant to the relationships and sexuality formation project 'A Fertile Heart: Receiving & Giving Creative Love'. As freelance consultant he works as Secretary to the Commission of Inquiry into Discrimination Against Christians in the UK and has just been appointed Executive Director for the UK branch of the International Voluntary Solidarity Fund

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