What Lesson are we Learning today:
Marriage is like learning algebra; divorce is like learning geometry.
Have you ever wandered into the wrong class in college? It would probably be pretty confusing, walking into a room expecting to see literature and finding weather maps instead. If you’re not careful, you can wind up learning the completely wrong lesson.
Right now, I have a dear friend going through a divorce. It breaks my heart to watch a 23-year-old woman and her husband split, especially when they have children together. The more we talk, the more I realize the heartbreaking truth. She just hasn’t learned the right lesson about marriage. Instead, my friend has learned the wrong one.
Algebra and Geometry.
If you walked into a classroom looking for algebra, you might be fooled for a bit if you found geometry instead. There’s numbers and x’s and y’s and equations all over the place. Most of us only vaguely remember the difference. At some point, it’s all just math. But if you were asked to solve an algebra problem with geometry functions, it wouldn’t work. Algebra and geometry are as different as marriage and divorce.
Gratitude and Bitterness.
Have you ever known a couple who was happy beyond the shadow of a doubt? The couple not only praises each other, but their support is unwavering. They never act like the other is an inconvenience. Their marriages are characterized by gratitude.
On the other hand, have you known a couple who’s divorce didn’t surprise you? They are riddled with conflict. They tear each other down, criticize one another, huff and turn away. You see no love in their eyes when they’re together. Their marriages are characterized by bitterness.
Statistically speaking, most people who get divorced once get divorced twice. If divorced people remarry, they’re more likely to divorce again than a couple who enters marriage with a clean slate. People who endure divorce learn to see marriage with bitterness. They see it through broken glasses. Divorcees have learned the wrong lesson.
Now What?
Thankfully, God heals all wounds. Not only are people are able to reconcile with God, but they also return to the joy of His marital blessings. In addition, lessons can be unlearned, new ones can be absorbed. If we clog up our heads with the wrong information, it will make navigating the right lesson much more difficult.
Are you learning the wrong lesson in your marriage?
