The Gift of Fatherhood

by | Aug 31, 2023 | Family Life, Parenting, Society

Fatherhood is a Unique, Beautiful Burden Leading to Selflessness and Fulfillment:

Fatherhood is difficult, just like motherhood.  See here: son, Peter, started to walk these last few weeks. He has been becoming so adventurous with letting go of the couch, chasing toys around, and standing without support. The first day he began taking steps unassisted, I was so excited I told Joshua while he was at work.

“Argh! Why do I not get to be around for these things!” Joshua said.

“Because you’re at work providing for our family, so that I can be home with our children,” I replied.

In a lot of ways, I feel like I got the better end of the deal in our marriage. Joshua has always been the provider. I have always been the homemaker. I would hate being away from my Peter Bear all day, only getting to see him for evenings and weekends. Joshua loves being home with us and treasures every second of home/family life.

Yet, whenever he’s home sick or taking care of Peter because I’m sick, he is rearing to return to work. I admire my husband’s sense of duty to his job. He wants to leave home, go work, go provide, and come back to us. As many days as he’d rather stay home longer, he truly wants to be out of the house taking care of our family.

A Mans Special Purpose:

As Joshua has told me, everyone has to work in life. With or without our marriage, he would be going to work from 8 to 5 every weekday. But going to work knowing it means I am home with our children makes him want to go. Coming home to our hugs and kisses makes the whole day worth working. While I would be miserable leaving our son every day, Joshua treasures the opportunity to provide for our every need.

The burden of motherhood involves pains of childbearing and pouring out of childrearing. However, the burden of fatherhood is making your daily actions heroic. Everyone has to work, but fathers work with purpose. They leave home for something more than themselves, more than their careers, more than their income. Fathers come home to chaos and joy and jump right back into the work for their wives and children.

St. Joseph is often referred to as an unsung hero. Mary is our primary focus when we think about Jesus being raised as a boy. Joseph was the quiet, literally unquoted man in the Bible who was the spouse to the perfect virgin. That is the burden and the gift of fatherhood: the heroic selflessness in everyday life.


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Michelle C. Martin

Michelle graduated from Texas Tech University with her husband, Joshua, in May 2021 and married him in June on the Solemnity of the Sacred Heart of Jesus. She has a degree in Communication Studies and has loved growing in knowledge of healthy and authentic relationships during her time in college and adulthood. Michelle and Joshua currently reside in Lubbock, TX where he works as an architect and she loves life as a stay-at-home wife and mother to their children, Peter and Cecilia.

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