Forgiveness of Injuries through Kindness

by | Jun 26, 2024 | Family Life, Marriage, Marriage Prep, Prayer, Society, Spirituality

“It (kindness) is shown in affability of speech, generosity of conduct, and forgiveness of injuries sustained” ~ Modern Catholic Dictionary.

Love is kind. We often imagine kindness to describe behaviors. When someone is helpful, we call them kind. If someone speaks gently, we see kindness. When our spouse cooks dinner unexpectedly, we call it kind. The real substance of kindness is much deeper. The Modern Catholic Dictionary defines kindness as a fruit of the Holy Spirit. “The quality of understanding sympathy and concern for those in trouble or need.”

As the MCD continues, kindness is shown in speech and conduct. What really stands out though, is describing kindness as forgiveness. When St. Paul says, “love is kind,” I have to imagine he was referring to this last piece.

Forgiveness of Injuries.

The longer we are married, the more time we have to grow our love. Unfortunately, that’s also more time to build up hurt. As I approach seven years of commitment to my husband, I realize we have lived a long history together. In our seasons of struggle, it is too easy to remember the worst parts of our relationship. The past is reflected in the present, and that’s true for everyone. We view our past in light of our present. When times are good, we remember the good. In times of bad, we drag the baggage of the past with us.

Forgiveness is the only release for past pain. Without forgiveness, we cannot understand sympathy and concern for those who have wronged us. We cannot set aside our own pain to care for another.

Love is kind, and kindness is forgiveness. St. Paul realized this would be an essential part of marriage; he didn’t have to be married to know it. It’s true for parents, siblings, and friends too. Forgiveness costs us nothing, but how hard is it to give? To release someone we love from the debt of “making amends”?

Generosity of Conduct.

Maybe this is where the other part of kindness helps. If we are struggling to forgive our spouse, we should remember we’ve chosen to marry them. They deserve every bit of our generosity, in our perception and treatment of them. Except in extreme circumstances, we should be able to remember we chose them for a good reason. They deserve our generosity, forgiveness, and kindness because we love them. We vowed to love, honor, and cherish them.

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Michelle C. Martin

Michelle graduated from Texas Tech University with her husband, Joshua, in May 2021 and married him in June on the Solemnity of the Sacred Heart of Jesus. She has a degree in Communication Studies and has loved growing in knowledge of healthy and authentic relationships during her time in college and adulthood. Michelle and Joshua currently reside in Lubbock, TX where he works as an architect and she loves life as a stay-at-home wife and mother to their children, Peter and Cecilia.

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